Groaners

Two sailors are shipwrecked in a small boat. They are desparate for a smoke and have three cigarettes and no matches. How do they solve their problem? They throw one cigarette overboard making the whole boat a cigarette lighter :-)


Norman, a 300 pound musician, wanted to begin a new choir. His doctor said it would be too hard on his heart and therefore he must lose some weight first. He went on a diet of Tab Cola and apples, and encouraged his choir members to do the same. Thus was the beginning of the "Norman Tab and Apple Choir.


Why do scuba divers jump backwards into the water? Because if they went forwards, they would jump into the boat.

Why are pirates called 'pirates'?
Because they ARRRGGHHHHHHH!

What do they call Star Trek In Japan?
Sulu Master Naviagtor!